Post funny quotes here. :D


<skrike> I think the people above me are having sex
<skrike> either that or they're sleeping restlessly and agreeing with each other a lot.

LMAO :hehe:

Classic ^_^

I'll post some later.

<Raize> can you guys see what I type?
<vecna> no, raize
<Raize> How do I set it up so you can see it?

Is this like that thread from YGOO? o.o

Me: Uurgh....*stuck inside the bathroom being violently sick*
Mom: Don't waste your time! See? Everytime your monthly exams come up you waste your time over such things! No wonder why your grades are so awful!
Me: .........-______-

^ that's what happened this morning...-__- (my parents are out so that's why I'm using the comp right now)

"When a man steals your wife there is no better revenge than to let him keep her."


:hehe:

o_O;;

How about: "When a woman steals your husband there is no better revenge than to let her keep him"? :P

^_^

"I can resist everything except temptation."


XD

Boy I love that one, but what about this one?!

<anamexis> oh man
<anamexis> I was opening a coke, right
--> Beefpile (~mbeefpile@cloaked.wi.rr.com) has joined #themacmind
<anamexis> and it exploded
<anamexis> ALMOST all over my keyboard
<anamexis> but I got it away just in time
<-- Beefpile has quit (sick fuckers)
<anamexis> :<

LOL

"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."

<Zybl0re> get up
<Zybl0re> get on up
<Zybl0re> get up
<Zybl0re> get on up
<phxl|paper> and DANCE
* nmp3bot dances :D-<
* nmp3bot dances :D|-<
* nmp3bot dances :D/-<
<[SA]HatfulOfHollow> i'm going to become rich and famous after i invent a device that allows you to stab people in the face over the internet

man: hey doc! what do I have to do to live a really long life?
doc: do you drink?
man: no
doc: do you smoke?
man: no
doc: do you like to play with women?
man: no
doc: then why the **** do you want to live a really long life?

(cade you changed your name back?)

:hehe: !

Nice One! ^_^

<Julius Caesar> I came, I saw, I conqured.. :=o

"I'm a mercenary. If you pay me enough I'll kill babies. I mean I won't like it, but hey I'll do it"

- Deadpool

Thats deadpool alright :hehe:

He's so freakin funny.

<Xander> So Supreme-Archbishop-Sedjet.
<Xander> What are you doing?
* Xander sits down next to Supreme-Archbishop-Sedjet.
<Xander> Look man, I don't want to have to kill you.
* Xander pulls a gun out.
<Xander> Now tell me what you're doing!
<Xander> I said now bitch!

Here are my favorites,

"I don't want to get naked with the bears and stop trying to stick that in me!!!"-Lenore the cute little dead girl

Here's a story,

Ragamuffin-"Lenore you look paler then before and you smell like rotting fish."

Lenore-I do?

Ragamuffin-That's bad.

Lenore-Oh, But i like fish.

Ragamuffin-That's still bad.

Lenore-Fishes go, poo poo poo.

Ragamuffin-Yes well, we need to take you to a Doctor.


And here's more.

Boy-*sqweezing a weird little toy that's eyes bug out when you sqweeze it*

Lenore-Where did you get that?

Boy-*points to a toy store* I got it over there.

Lenore-Ooo, Bye bye. *and she walks over to the pet shop next to the toy shop*

Shopkeeper-Hey little lady what are you looking for?

Lenore-Um, you can hold them and boys play with them and you can play with them.

Shopkeeper-I think i know what you're looking for. *points to the open Hamster display, And goes back to looking at a magazine*

Lenore-*Walks over to the Hamsters and picks one up and starts sqweezing it untill it's eyes pop out*

Lenore-Broken *drops the hamster on the floor* i guess i need to find one that works.

Lenore- *sqweezes all the Hamsters untill their eyes pop out and they
die*

Lenore-*Walks back to the front of the pet shop*

Shopkeeper-So you didn't find one you liked eh?

Lenore-Nope they were all broken. bye

Shopkeeper-Okay bye, heh broken wait, broken?

Lenore-*Leaves shop*

Shopkeeper-Oh sweet jesus! *vomits*

Lenore-I guess i need to find better toys.



Thank you

Actually I don't really have to post a quote... since I already have a good quote in my sig :P

But ah... Here is a quote from a funny movie:

A conversation between person 1 and person 2

Person 1 is driving around in a blue car with orange wheels.
"Hey! That is my car!"
"How do you know it is your car?"
"I reconize it everywhere."
"Ow yeah? What does it looks like?"
"It's blue with orange wheels."
Person 1 drives back in the same car only orange with blue wheels.
"I mean orange with blue wheels"
Person 1 drives back again in the same car only yellow with orange wheels.
"I mean yellow with orange wheels."
Person 1 stops the car before person 2.
"It's all in the mind, you know."

Voice: Hello? Is a Howard Good there?
Arthur Good: I'm Good, but not that Good.
Voice: ...

"We're a post-modern superhero group, we don't do bravery"

(- X-Statix- The Anarchist)

"Computer monkey doesn't do field trips"

(-Planetery- The Drummer)

"Hey Frank, nice buns. You ever think of trying out for the backstreet boys?"

(Deadpool to The Punisher)

"Snikt me!! Snikt me!! Snikt me!!"

(Deadpool to Wolverine)

Boster Gold: "Hey Mare"
Mary Marvel: "Yes"
Boster Gold: "They way you are holding me is kinda uncomfortable"
Mary Marvel: "Oh I'm sorry"
Boster Gold: "Would you mind moving your hand a little lower"
Blue Beetle "BOSTER!!!!"
Boster Gold "What?"

(The Super-Buddies, OR Formely Known As The Justice League)

<Nori123> You don't know jack #@)$&*%!
<VioletSky> That's not true, I know him well
<Nori123> Haha
<VioletSky> I'm serious
<VioletSky> Jack is the son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt Inc. They had one son, Jack. In turn Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt, the deeply religious couple produced 6 children
<VioletSky> Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins: Deap Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her parents' objections, Deap Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school drop out.
<VioletSky> However, after being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later remarried Ted Sherlock and, because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name.
<VioletSky> She was then known as Noe Schitt-Sherlock. Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt and they produced a son of nervous disposition, Chicken Schitt.
<VioletSky> Two other of the 6 children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony.
<VioletSky> The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens wedding. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Hoarse.
<VioletSky> Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.
<VioletSky> So there.
<FiPo> LOL
<Nori123> I have actually chortled coke through my nose

* DarthJesus hands Kes a smilie face balloon.
<DarthJesus> IT'S ALWAYS RAINING IN MY MIND
<DarthJesus> AHHH




* Kes can't stand MTV.
<Kes> They always play horrid music.
<DarthJesus> Um.
<DarthJesus> I don't know if you noticed but they have 23 hours of no music.
<DarthJesus> And then like 3 Music Videos.
<DarthJesus> And then some commercials saying 'ONG GET TESTED FOR HIV!!!'

[23:22] <SensesFail> your mom call the cops again?
[23:23] <Naruto-Kyuubi> um...no?
[23:23] <Native-Homies> ......
[23:24] <Native-Homies> NO one gives A #@)$&*%!
[23:24] <Native-Homies> Whats going on anyways?
[23:24] <Naruto-Kyuubi> no one gives a #@)$&*%! about your face, Naruto-Kyuubi
[23:24] <Naruto-Kyuubi> eh
[23:24] <Naruto-Kyuubi> wow
[23:24] <Naruto-Kyuubi> i just completely owned myself
[23:24] <Naruto-Kyuubi> >.>!
[23:24] <Naruto-Kyuubi> * Native-Homies
[23:24] <Native-Homies> ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOFLLLLLLLLLLLL
[23:25] <Naruto-Kyuubi> STFU!

Very weird conversation.....

Me: hey, can I have this?
unidentified person: Well sure, but smell is first, it smells awful!
Me: But can I eat it?
UP: Sure, I don't care....
Me: can I lick it and spend the night with it?
UP: Wait...are we talking about the same thing??
Me: Yes, that rum cake sitting on the counter right?
Up: Yes....O.o
Me: So can have it??

* Tyrin-Claw returns with soup.
* osirisX is now known as Away
<Sexy-Atem> What kind of soup?!
<Sexy-Atem> Chicken?
<Sexy-Atem> Cream of something?!
<Sexy-Atem> Tomato?!
<Tyrin-Claw> Cream of osirisX!
<Sexy-Atem> I was just thinking that!
<Sexy-Atem> Wait a minute.
<Sexy-Atem> osirisX wanked off into your soup?
<Sexy-Atem> O_o;
* Away is now known as osirisX
<osirisX> >>!
<Tyrin-Claw> I said cream, not ejaculation.

XDDDD

Me: No, the shaving mirror is the most important!
Woman: But the map-
Man: I think the 5 gallons of water is the most important.
Me: We should get help before trying to survive!
Man: I think that we should try and survive before we try to get help.
Me: But-
Woman: Anyway, we need to know where we are, so the map is the most important.
Me: No, maps aren't important when you're stuck in the middle of the ocean, with the nearest island 1000 miles away.
Woman: But-
Man: Water is the most important, we'd die of thirst if-
Me: We wouldn't die for the first day without water!
Woman: The map-
Man: We need to survive first before we get help!
Me: No we-

^ very random conversation from my last class a few minutes ago >_>

VayneAM: .•°† SORA †°•.
VayneAM: user name of a wicked hot goth chick on a forum
Newzteen: O_o;
Newzteen: Sora is the name of some girl off season 1 of Digimon.
Newzteen: Oh crap.
Newzteen: Now you've resparked my interest in digimon you #@)$&*%! bastard.
Newzteen: -_-
VayneAM: XD!

Yes, but .•°† SORA †°•. is a biotch. :|

Dammit Newz....Swear filter's piss me off. *cries*

* Xander detonates his suicide bomb.
* Xander killed all the infidels.
* Xander wins.



-------------------------------------------------------


<yatalocker> I wanna be in that Quotes Thread.
<yatalocker> I should say something memorable and funny
<yatalocker> I can't think of anything.

-----------------------------------------------------------

<osirisX> my english presentation was absolutely #@)$&*%! up XD!
<Xander> Did you pass?!
<osirisX> i dont know yet
<osirisX> see, it was a group presentation
<Xander> You should've just saved it at the end by being like "BEE ARE BEE", then flipping them off and running away.
<osirisX> and let me just list the things that went wrong:
<osirisX> 1. my friend played Antony, he used an arnold schwarzenneger voice ._.
<osirisX> 2. the same guy played another character and used an irish voice
<osirisX> mind you, this was set in roman times
<osirisX> 3. the same guy forgot some lines
<osirisX> 4. my other friend kept putting me off
<osirisX> 5. my teacher was like what the #@)$&*%! are they doing when he heard the voices
<Xander> if you fail I'd kill your friend.
<Tyrin-Claw> Well osirisX, let me tell you about a group presentation I did in English last year...
<osirisX> ok :)
<Tyrin-Claw> My two partners were both sleeping through the presentation.
<Tyrin-Claw> So I did the whole thing myself.
<osirisX> o-o
<Xander> Tyrin-Claw got all confused and started acting like a dinosaur.
<Tyrin-Claw> And I got like 100%.
<osirisX> XD!
<Tyrin-Claw> So no worries. :)
<Tyrin-Claw> Argh!
<Tyrin-Claw> Stop seeing through my stories!
<osirisX> lucky, each person gets marked seperatly

"Newzfoxjr": I hate it when characters in Naruto say "I guess I'll have to finish it with "that"" >_>
"Newzfoxjr": It's happened twice in 270 already. ._.
Tejerian: And they never tell you what "that" is?
"Newzfoxjr": Not until they use it.
Tejerian: I love it when they do that. XD
Tejerian: So typical though.
"Newzfoxjr": Yeah. ._.
Tejerian: "What's for dinner?"
"This, that, that, this, and a little of this and that on the side."

<Tyrin-Claw> Patience is a virtue. <_<
<Xander> So is shutting the hell up!

<Xander>"<-- GO STRONGBAD! SHAKE THOSE HIPS!"

"I don't have to be careful! I have a gun!"~Homer Simpson

alright, I'm reaching with this one, but...

Thios one was quite a while back
---

<Me> *2 cards in hand*
<Sean_Wheeler> acticates Deliquent Duo
<Me> Discards both cards individually
<Sean Wheeler> One has to be random!
< Me> they both go the the graveyard anyway
<Sean_Wheeler> Yeah, but 1 has to be random
<Me> It doesn't really make a difference
<Sean_Wheeler> One of the cards has to be random and you can choose the other
<Me> This doesn't make any sense... Whatever
<Me> *Returns both cards to my hand, then discards one at random, then manually discards the other.
<Sean_Wheeler> Good
---

Sean_Wheeler is the stupidest duelist I've ever met. =\

XD!!!


Haha.


I dueled him before he was totally like that. XD



--------


Newzteen: Hey look I'm you!
Newzteen: o_O;
Moliote: o_O;

* Tyrin-Claw hands everyone pancakes.
<Diabound> o_O;
* Diabound eats the pancakes
* Tyrin-Claw makes exasperated noises.
<Tyrin-Claw> You weren't supposed to eat them!
<Tyrin-Claw> You were supposed to wear them!
<Diabound> o.o
<Tyrin-Claw> Don't you know how to use pancakes?!
* Diabound spits pancakes out and wears them
<Tyrin-Claw> XD

Newzteen: We should make a clan when AL opens up called the face clan since we use faces so much!
Moliote: XD
Newzteen: And we'd like have our own face language.
Newzteen: We'd be like O_o'' o_O; o.o; XD O_O o.o
Moliote: XDDDDD lmao rotflmao!! XDDD

^ o_O
^^ o__O
^^^ o___O

<DarkAngel> http://www.mirc.com
<DarkAngel> D/l mIRC.
<DarkAngel> x.x
<Starfox> whats that for
<DarkAngel> mIRC.
<Secks> XD