Name: Snowcone
Age: 1 year, 1 month
Gender: Female
Pack: Loner
Position:
Appearance: Snowcone is a red wolf, muscular but lean. Her fur is long and soft. Her eyes are gold and have a kind expression. Her face has the expression of one who is timid and cautious. Her gait is slow and purposeful, but she can move quickly when she needs to. She can often be seen with her tail between her legs. Her tail, when it is out, has a white tip. The very tips of her ears are also white. Her feet are big, but not too big for her body. Her ears are erect in an alert position. She is always looking out for danger. When she speaks, her voice is slightly high-pitched and sounds almost worried. When she is in comfortable surroundings, her voice is actually quite sweet and pleasant, and doesn't sound so timid. Her tail comes out from between her legs, showing the tip that looks like snow. Her stance and gait becomes more confident. She looks very beautiful, especially when she is not scared. She is missing a toe on her left rear paw.
Personality: Friendly, but timid. Snowcone would rather hang alone than get in a fight. She sometimes tries to make friends with other wolves, but if they do anything that makes her nervous, she is prone to run off. Even if the other wolf meant no harm, if she gets nervous, she bolts. Her fight or flight response always gives her flight. She has a tendency to be overly submissive. Often, her first show of submission is to roll completely over on her back, sometimes even urinating a bit. When she warms up to you though, she is quite possibly the sweetest wolf you ever met. She is very affectionate. She is very sweet and gentle around pups, and would just as soon show them the love and kindness that she never received as a pup.
History: Snowcone was born into a very mean pack. The pack was notorious for being very vicious, and intruders beware! She was the third born in a litter of five pups born to the alpha pair. It seemed everyone in the pack had a mean streak. It was in their blood, born into them. Before Snowcone, there had never, ever been a wolf in that pack with one ounce of kindness. Her siblings would often fight more viciously than most pups would when they were old enough to start fighting. It was never a "play fight". They always had a bone to pick with each other. Sibling rivalry was taken to the most extreme levels possible. Snowcone never seemed to have that mean streak though. She would rather be a nice wolf. That made her despised by many of the pack. When she and her siblings were six months old, they began training to fight, and even kill, anyone that stood in their way. Snowcone just didn't have it in her to fight. So they decided that she would make a good bait. She spent the next 6 months of her life constantly trying to run away from the rest of the pack and hiding. One day, one of her siblings got ahold of her left rear paw and managed to rip off one of the toes. Finally, on her first birthday, the alpha male, her own father, ordered that Snowcone be killed. She knew she had to leave the pack altogether. She couldn't stay there another minute. She didn't want to be killed for being nice. She thought it just wasn't fair. So she ran as fast as her legs could carry her. She ran from her pack's territory. She had been running for a month, but wouldn't give up her search for something better. She was getting lean from not eating a lot over the last month, but she was determined to find a better life.
Can you add more to Appearence and Personality and ALOT more to history.
History should be the longest part in a description. For an idea on what length your application needs to be check some Accepted descriptions.
A few more sentences to each please and could you please leave a line between each section as it makes it easier for us to read.
*stamps with stamp of approval*
ACCEPTED!!!!! Though you need to work on your sentence structure this is fine.