outatimedelorean:
I wrote this fan fic for a couple weeks now, its not finished yet, as I'm still working on it. Its about Marty getting killed, and Doc telling the truth. Rather than give you more details about it, you can read it here:
www.geocities.com/outatimedelorean/BTTF.htm

January 19, 2004, 11:35 PM: Message edited by: outatimedelorean

***83sDMC***:
interesting.but may I propose that Dave and Linda do in fact marry eachother. I like that better.

outatimedelorean:
Quote:
Originally posted by 83sdmc:
interesting.but may I propose that Dave and Linda do in fact marry eachother. I like that better.
Not a bad idea, I wonder what'll their kids would look like. Any other suggestions or ideas?

***83sDMC***:
Well I just kept wondering why doc doesnt go back and prevent this terrible disaster from happening?

AlternateStrickland:
Quote:
Originally posted by outatimedelorean:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by 83sdmc:
interesting.but may I propose that Dave and Linda do in fact marry eachother. I like that better.
Not a bad idea, I wonder what'll their kids would look like. Any other suggestions or ideas? </font>[/QUOTE]No please, let them get married to other people. This is the improved timeline. I hope you were joking. They are not really important to the story anyway...

outatimedelorean:
Quote:
Originally posted by AlternateStrickland:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by outatimedelorean:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by 83sdmc:
interesting.but may I propose that Dave and Linda do in fact marry eachother. I like that better.
Not a bad idea, I wonder what'll their kids would look like. Any other suggestions or ideas? </font>[/QUOTE]No please, let them get married to other people. This is the improved timeline. I hope you were joking. They are not really important to the story anyway... </font>[/QUOTE]I was only joking, I wasn't really going to change it to that.

Quote:
Originally posted by 83sdmc:
Well I just kept wondering why doc doesnt go back and prevent this terrible disaster from happening?
Then Doc would actually see Marty die, so it was much better that he found out years later instead.

***83sDMC***:
But then in years later why doesnt he some how go back and save marty?That is what I mean.

outatimedelorean:
Quote:
Originally posted by 83sdmc:
But then in years later why doesnt he some how go back and save marty?That is what I mean.
That was my original idea, but it became too confusing to write, so I abandoned it, and wrote the one you see now. Maybe I'll write the original one as an alternate version to this fan fic someday...

Blind Spot:
Whenever I review a fanfic (or anything), I usually always make it on the good side - I don't like to flame people. If I don't like it, I usually just don't say anything.

With that, I have to say parts of this weren't a bad idea. However, it sure is depressing and sad. Why do soemthing like this? Besides, I really doubt Doc would just let Marty die like that - even if he said so, he'd eventually go back. It's just his style.

***83sDMC***:
Ya I agree with you about Doc blind spot.I think it would be out of character for him do just let Marty die.Especially once he finds out that marty's brother and sister are married with inbred kids. He will definitly stop it then!

outatimedelorean:
Originally, I did have Doc go and rescue Marty before he was killed by a train, and Marty is alive in the future. After I thought about that, I wondered about what happened in the original timeline before Doc rescued Marty.

flying-delorean:
marty dead!

Pok JmPek:
Okay, normally I wouldn’t have a problem with this at all, and in fact my language in real life is probably just as bad, but using four profanities (two of which were the f-word) within the first sentence not only is unlike the entire genre, but also is offensive to the senses. I honestly just stopped reading when I realized that there were incomplete sentences, making this more like an outline of a story. I understand it is incomplete, and this is a "sort of" outline, but why are some things fleshed out and others aren’t? I understand "sneak-peaks" but I really have no idea if this is an outline or a plot summery, or a work in progress version of the document you are actually writing. I really don’t want to sound like I am flaming, but clean it up, and I may read it. This is a perfectly dark subject that I would be more than thrilled to read if it was done without assaulting my capabilities as a reader (I’m sorry, but the phrase "for the **** of it” is both weak and a cop-out). The characterizations (so far) aren’t motivated and the entire story line needs work. More blunt than usual, but I think its probably better to be blunt in this situation than overly kind. Ignore these comments as you wish, just understand that they how at least one reader feels, and if there is one, I’m sure there are more.

outatimedelorean:
^Its not a sneak peek, outline, or plot summary. Actually, its a work in progress, but it'll be done when its done. I'm just kind of busy, but when more is added, just check out the link to see if its been updated or not.

88_mph:
If Doc went back though, none of that sweet stuff would happen for Marty. He wouldn't get a statue, red might not become a millianare.Like the details on Biff, hahaha.

Doc Hollywood:
Just a small point, I think if Marty actually had been hit by that train he wouldn't have been knocked unconcious and died two hours later. More likely he'd have been completely dismembered.

Jamie McFly:
^Exactly, they can take him to the hospital still, they just have to gather up the body parts.

Ok, I'm grossing my self out. Poor Marty.

outatimedelorean:
^I'll change it when I get a chance, besides it sounds a lot better. I should've written it that way in the first place, but I didn't.

TimeTrain:
It sure was something never-done-before (or how do I know, I haven't read so much fan fictions).. But very sad idea..

Quote:
Red, the bum, got a job and became a millionaire.
LOL, well there was something good!

Tekva:
If it's not your vision, don't do it! Do what YOU think is appropriate for your story, not what someone else thinks it should be. In essence, although you're writing for other fans, what makes it special is because it's your own vision.

I do agree with the other readers, however, that what you have here is an outline...if you take a glance at some of the fan fiction that Kristen, Mary Jean Holmes,Aaron or Hot for Doc have written, just for starters, you'll see how a story should progress so it's readable and understandable for others who can't see inside your own inner projector! Don't forget plot points, either! Those little points along the way that move your story forward from beginning to end. They're the skeleton you hang your story on.

As far as profanity goes, I think it works if it's used non-gratuitously. I don't use it myself, because I *personally* don't like it, but I've seen it work when it's used well. Groucho Marx, of all people, once said something about blue (off-color) humor that stuck with me. I think it applies here, too. He said if you feel you HAVE to use blue material (or in this case, profanity) to make your point, then you can be pretty sure your humor (in this case, your writing) is weak at that point. Use it if you feel you need to as part of the character's natural personality, but don't stick it in just for shock value or if you think the word will make your strongest point for you. Let the circumstances, and how your character reacts to the circumstaces, make your point.

Don't be discouraged...just use your outline as a starting point, and develop! And don't forget to polish, polish, polish!

booklover:
i donnt like anything regarding marty geting killed, but its good.

Marty,jr:
Im sorry but i dont like the idea of Marty getting killed. Likein the third one when marshell strickland died in the deleted scene.

outatimedelorean:
Someone in this thread posted this:

Quote:
At the end of part 3.
Train is coming towards Marty but he can't open the door. The train runs right over him.

Everytime I saw that, I cried. I thought, "Why not make this into a fanfic?" So I did. I'll finish it someday, but its kinda hard to write.

Marty's #1 Fan:
I only have one issue with it, besides its unfinished shortness and lack of detail...

It takes trains like that four miles to come to a stop.

flux capacitor....fluxing:
thats such a sad story.
why didn't Doc go back and stop marty form being killed?
at least biff stops calling people "buttheads"

marty's_true_love:
No! Why!? that's so sad. at least some good sort of came out of it. But it burn. Burns with the white hot intensity of a thousand suns!

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As of 12/17/2005, link has changed to http://www.geocities.com/outatimedelorean/...h_of_marty.html