AARON:
has arrived. My idea of how Doc made out during his eight month stay in 1885.

"Doc Arrives"

As always, feedback is encouraged. I'm especially not satisfied with Part III (mainly the entombing of the time machine), so if anyone has any suggestions about how to improve that portion, I'd be much obliged.

TEKVA:
Aaron, I'm just finishing up Part I and I just wanted to tell you that this is GREAT so far! I think this is the best thing you've done to date! More in a bit...gotta get back to reading, but I did want you to know it's very good!

"Hill Valley needs a court house, don't you think, Emmett?"

"Couldn't hurt."

HAAH!!!

And hummm! So THAT'S what happened to Doc on the Fourth of July! Finally, the story's been told! Hey, Aaron, the REASON you gave for Doc not being able to tolerate alcohol is brilliant! Never even occurred to me that MIGHT be a possibility!

"With one last look at his wonderful, horrible invention..." Nice turn of a phrase!

Very, very good...keep going! Can't wait to read the rest.

AARON:
Thanks, Tekva! I'm sooo glad you like it so far! Your opinion means a lot to me!

Be sure to let me know about the stuff that doesn't work for you though (I'm sure it's far from perfect). I've read it so many times already that it's practically impossible for me to pick out some of the rotten stuff since the story's so ingrained in my head!

TEKVA:
Your solution to Doc's hobbling of the horse for shoeing works...he also could have used a twitch and wouldn't have had to touch the horse to do it...but that would've required some cooperation from Buford, so the hobble worked very well.

CHRISTINA:
Wow, very good story! About time we found out what happened to Doc during those months in 1885. Very original ideas concerning July 4th, the horseshoeing incident with Buford, etc..

I also liked the multiple drafts of the letter to Marty. The only thing I thought I should point out: while I liked your explanation as to why Doc doesn't drink (very neat), it has a dark implication. In part 3, when Doc goes to the saloon aftr his confrontation with Clara, it would imply that his motives for asking Chester to leave the bottle are darker than just getting wasted. Just a thought. Anyway, very awesome work!

TEKVA:
Christina, re: "Leave the bottle." YOW!!!! You're right!

Aaron, I think you've started something here!

BLIND SPOT:
Oh boy, where to start. I can't honestly think of a good few words to describe it, just that it was great.

I like how it focused on indivisual pieces of the story (January; a quick stop in April; not one, but three July 4th incidents; and finally the closing days).

Speaking of July 4th, I quite enjoyed getting the answers to 3 things: What Chester was talking about that happened that day; the horse shoeing incident; and Seamus getting kicked out of the bar.

I also liked that you made some of the characters out to be slightly different than I have perceived in all the years of watching Part 3. Chester, for instance, was more of a Wild Western, blunt sort of guy. In the beginning, he reminded me of a funnier Lou (who, of course, would work there in 70 years).

Just curious, if you had any idea what happened with Frank's replacement blacksmith in the original timeline. If history didn't skew too far off course, we'll have to assume the original new guy didn't start until September, anyway.

If not, what do ya think became of him with Doc now there?

The last part -- including the burial of the time machine -- was probably my favorite. Just the way he's thinking about Marty and how (even though we know how it turns out anyway) we wonder about the seemingly very real possibility that the plan could go wrong and the pair will never see each other again. That part almost made me cry - which I've rarely done reading fanfics!

Marley does remind me of the quintessential grumpy old man (and a somewhat shady character on top of it! We get the feeling he might not be too true to his word - evidentally he was, though).

I almost hoped the original letter would've prevailed over the new one. Surely, he could've found somewhere -- possibly in the next nearest town, or at Seamus' farm -- to hide out until the 6th.

I'm sure looking forward to the 'To Be Continued' part.

I'd always wondered how his life would've turned out if Marty hadn't come back for him and he wasn't killed by Buford. I theorize with the rejuvie there's a slight chance he could have lived to 1955 naturally. That would make him 135 years old, and physically 95-105. Not too likely, but not impossible.

DOC LATHROP BROWN:
That was astoundingly excellent. You took such time and care with Doc's character that I congratulate you.

It was all incredibly realistic. It really felt like the natural progression of events that would follow the misadventure in the sky.

I was also really pleased that, although Buford was still a pain, you didn't turn Doc, Samus, OR Marshall Strickland spineless as a result of his existance. I was really, really pleased how Strickland wasn't going to take ANY problems from Tannen.

I also really like how you handled Doc and the DeLorean. As many know, I'm nuts on the DeLorean's so called "death and resurrection" due to it's 70-year incarceration, I feel as if the car was the ultimate trumpcard, a shining beacon of hope to those in need. I really began to loathe the vehicle as much as Doc had been when he contemplated that he wanted to destroy it, but he was working as hard as he could to repair it! I also really like the phrase you used. "With one last look at his wonderful, horrible invention..." It truly is the definition of the Infernal Machine. And I find it really interesting how he just drove it into the mine and the walled up area. It never occured to me that he would. I always thought he'd pull it in. but given the car itself being in fine condition, driving it would be the logical choice.

Once again, a truly great read.

AARON:
Thanks so much to everyone who replied! You guys are fast readers (at least compared to me, who is a very slooooooow reader).

Originally posted by Christina:
The only thing I thought I should point out: while I liked your explanation as to why Doc doesn't drink (very neat), it has a dark implication. In part 3, when Doc goes to the saloon aftr his confrontation with Clara, it would imply that his motives for asking Chester to leave the bottle are darker than just getting wasted.

Wow, I never thought of that before. It kind of makes you think about just how depressed Doc was (at least in my universe)...

Originally posted by Blind Spot:
Just curious, if you had any idea what happened with Frank's replacement blacksmith in the original timeline. If history didn't skew too far off course, we'll have to assume the original new guy didn't start until September, anyway.

If not, what do ya think became of him with Doc now there?

Who knows? I hope that the original guy moved onto bigger and better things (though, not too much bigger or better, for the sake of the time continuum)

The last part -- including the burial of the time machine -- was probably my favorite. Just the way he's thinking about Marty and how (even though we know how it turns out anyway) we wonder about the seemingly very real possibility that the plan could go wrong and the pair will never see each other again. That part almost made me cry - which I've rarely done reading fanfics!

Wow, I didn't realize it was that touching when I wrote it. Glad it moved ya'.


I'm sure looking forward to the 'To Be Continued' part.

Well, pop in Part III and have a look.

Sorry if that "To Be Continued" gave the wrong impression, but I'm afraid that's all. I need a break from the old west, anyhow.

Originally posted by Doc Lathrop Brown:
That was astoundingly excellent. You took such time and care with Doc's character that I congratulate you.

Thanks! I'm glad you thought I handled Doc properly! He's not the easiest character to write.

It was all incredibly realistic. It really felt like the natural progression of events that would follow the misadventure in the sky.

I also really like how you handled Doc and the DeLorean. As many know, I'm nuts on the DeLorean's so called "death and resurrection" due to it's 70-year incarceration, I feel as if the car was the ultimate trumpcard, a shining beacon of hope to those in need. I really began to loathe the vehicle as much as Doc had been when he contemplated that he wanted to destroy it, but he was working as hard as he could to repair it! I also really like the phrase you used. "With one last look at his wonderful, horrible invention..." It truly is the definition of the Infernal Machine. And I find it really interesting how he just drove it into the mine and the walled up area. It never occured to me that he would. I always thought he'd pull it in. but given the car itself being in fine condition, driving it would be the logical choice.

I'm glad you thought that everything with the time machine's burial made sense! I've never buried anything in a mine before, so I wasn't sure how accurate I was or if I made some major boo-boos. But if nobody says anything, I'll assume I did all right (or that everyone else is as clueless as I am in those regards!).

Originally posted by Tekva:
And hummm! So THAT'S what happened to Doc on the Fourth of July! Finally, the story's been told! Hey, Aaron, the REASON you gave for Doc not being able to tolerate alcohol is brilliant! Never even occurred to me that MIGHT be a possibility!

It just came to me when I was writing that part during the hangover scene. Glad you thought it was as creative as I did!

Oh, and I forgot to give out my two special thanks when I first posted this. The first goes to Blind Spot, who created the topic that inspired me to write the opening paragraph to this story, which then snowballed for five months!

And the other goes to Tekva, who was kind enough to supply me with her knowledge of horses to make that portion of the story as accurate as possible!

So what about the negatives? I love positive feedback (and I'm really glad to have it) but I know it's not perfect yet. Any suggestions of improvement?

SHONASH CLAYTON EASTWOOD:
It is a great fic! Just some minor spelling boo-boos but no big deal. IMHO

Also, In part 1, just one line is a tad "odd".

"I'm liable to electrocute myself to death if I keep up with this tenacity," Doc mumbled to himself.

I just think it would read better if you dropped the "to death"??

EASTWOOD MCFLY:
Im on Friday September 2 Part....So far it's awesome.
Sometimes I leave the document right on my computer becase usually I have to go do something else...Once I signed off and I came back it was gone!! Then I remember where I left off and then got it again from this link. I was like.

GREAT JOB so far...

AARON:
Originally posted by Shonash Clayton Eastwood:
It is a great fic! Just some minor spelling boo-boos but no big deal. IMHO.

Also, In part 1, just one line is a tad "odd".
"I'm liable to electrocute myself to death if I keep up with this tenacity," Doc mumbled to himself.

I just think it would read better if you dropped the "to death"??

Hmm, you may be right. Whenever I get around to editing it, I'll put that on my list. And thanks for the constructive criticism!

Originally posted by Eastwood McFly:
Im on Friday September 2 Part....So far it's awesome.
Sometimes I leave the document right on my computer becase usually I have to go do something else...Once I signed off and I came back it was gone!! Then I remember where I left off and then got it again from this link. I was like [cheesy graemlin].

GREAT JOB so far...

AARON:
Thanks so much! If I can put just one [cheesy] on someone's face, then I think I've accomplished something.

DOCSGIRL:
yay! finally just a doc story! i really liked it aaron! it was so much better than mine and i'm glad somebody wrote it....i started to but it was just too hard....part of me is looking forward to reading more i cant wait but part of is sad to read what is going to happen next because we know what is going to happen to my poor doc....cant wait to read more!

BLIND SPOT:
Actually, Aaron, there's just one little thing I'm slightly confused and wondered about. The following is paraphrased.

[i]Bright, burning sunlight aroused a rather grumpy Emmett Brown. // The time circuits read January 1, 1885. 6:57 AM.

It's just that New Years is right about at the shortest day of the year. The crack of dawn is usually about 6:30-6:40 AM around this time of the year. So, shortly before 7, it should still be almost twilight-ish.

In fact, when I was younger, I was really fascinated by sunrises and times. Something I realized was that the very first crack of sunlight (and I do mean the first teeny shade of dark blue) is almost exactly 1 hour before the newspaper reports the sunrise time to be.

Well, that's about it. I almost feel guilty for making such a small nitpick, on Christmas Eve, no less!

AARON:
Originally posted by Blind Spot:
Well, that's about it. I almost feel guilty for making such a small nitpick, on Christmas Eve, no less!

Heh, don't worry about it. I'm probably the biggest nitpicker that ever picked a nit, so it's all good. And you're right. Just stuck the time into the Sun and Moon Data web site and saw that sunrise wouldn't be until 7:24. The sad part is that I probably looked it up before I chose that time and still got it wrong.

I'll have to fix it on the next update.

And thanks DocsBabyGirl! I'm so glad you liked it! (I was afraid you'd think that I was trying to steal your thunder or something.)

But let me reiterate again that I really don't have any plans for a conclusion (Part III handled that pretty well, I think). I think I'll have to take that "To Be Continued" out on the next edit, too ...

But again, thanks for all the feedback!

PAM BRIGGS:
I just assumed that at the end of Part 3 when you said TO BE CONTINUED, that everyone knows what happened then, and you were just telling us that it continues in BACK TO THE FUTURE PART 3. Maybe I am wrong but that's the expression I got. Great job, Aaron as always. I like your stories, and am eager to read this one. Hope you have a new one out soon. Keep it up!

DOCSGIRL:
Originally posted by Aaron:
And thanks DocsBabyGirl! I'm so glad you liked it! (I was afraid you'd think that I was trying to steal your thunder or something.)

no i really liked it! i give you a lot of credit for writing it because i found it really hard to write

AARON:
^ Thanks! It wasn't the easiest for me to write either, but I'm glad I saw this one through.

Originally posted by Pam Briggs:
I just assumed that at the end of Part 3 when you said TO BE CONTINUED, that everyone knows what happened then, and you were just telling us that it continues in BACK TO THE FUTURE PART 3. Maybe I am wrong but that's the expression I got. Great job, Aaron as always. I like your stories, and am eager to read this one. Hope you have a new one out soon. Keep it up![/u]

Thanks a lot, Pam! It always makes my day to hear comments like that!

And, yeah, that is what I intended the "To Be Continued" to represent, but I could see where there could be some confusion, considering the last time I did it there was a sequel. I guess 60 pages worth wasn't enough!

TEKVA:
Bumping! We can't let this story topic slide down the page -- the story is just too good.

Now, all in favor of harrassing Aaron for another part to this? ME!

CHRISTINA:
I second that! Though I'm not too sure where you could go with a continuation of this story...perhaps following Doc between the time of the train incident and when he meets Marty on the tracks with his family? Don't mind me, just spouting here.

I find that time period really fascinating, because it was a whole other century. Talk about culture shock for Marty and Doc!

Oh, and btw, Happy Birthday to Tekva!

AARON:
Aw, you guys are sweet!

I really haven't even ever considered any kind of a sequel, and there really aren't any ideas jumping out at me and asking me to write them. Not that I would mind writing another (it would be SO much easier now that I've got a lot of the research under my belt), just that I wouldn't know where else to go with it.

And happy birthday, Tekva!

STANZATION:
I have a small idea on how you could begin the next part (if you want to do it). Doc finishes his day out as usual and goes to bed that night kinda both saddened that he'll never see Marty or 1985 again and relieved that he solved his problem of getting Marty home. The next morning Sept. 2 he wakes up as usual and carries out his daily busines as well as keeping a strong eye out for bufrod and his gang. The next day Sept. 3rd Doc is in his shop when he hears gunshots and looks out his window and sees a young man being dragged by buford. Then they hang him from the courthouse scaffolding. Doc realizes it Marty and gets his rifle...well I think you know what happens after that...

Just an idea for maybe a short part to finish it. Whatever you want to do.

TEKVA:
Thanks for the birthday wishes! On the night I was born in the year I was born (December 31, 1955) the Honeymooner's episode that George laughs at in Part One was aired! That was a looonnnnnggg time ago!!!

Aaron, if you do explore this any further, why don't you just take it to its logical conclusion? Up to the point at the Festival where Doc is shot (avoiding that, of course, if it makes you feel sorta squeamish). It would be interesting to see Doc and Clara's relationship burgeoning without Marty there. Did anything different happen between them? For one thing, the DeLorean wouldn't have been in the smith's shop when Clara showed up.

BLIND SPOT:
^ I didn't know it was your birthday until now, Tekva. Best wishes, and have a happy birthday.

As for the fic, yeah, I would also be curious as to how the strictly "Doc & Clara" timeline went. For instance, did Buford warn him about the "Bullet in his back," and what exactly happened at the festival?

Even though I'd get sad watching Doc dying over the next two days, part of me is curious about it as well. It doesn't have to focus on grizzly details of his injury, but more of what he might've said to her on his deathbed, etc.

I don't think it would change opinions of Buford. We know he's just flat out bad as it is.

AARON:
I'll consider it, but no promises (although everyone is very convincing!).

I do think it would be interesting to write Doc's death. Sad, but interesting.

BLIND SPOT (February 28, 2004):
Aaron, where have ya been?

OK, I thought I'd bump this to say something I originally intended to, but the idea got lost in the shuffle of all the other discussions we were having.

It never occurred to me that Buford accidentally shot his horse simultaneously as it threw him off. I always assumed he got mad that he fell off and simply shot the horse out of anger.

It obviously wouldn't make too much sense to shoot the poor horse (not to mention, more than cruel), but then again, logical thinking and a Tannen don't always go hand in hand!!

FRASIER CRANE:
Great story! Just one little nipick:

[i]Lawrence Strickland must have been the descendant of the Mr. Strickland of his present, Hill Valley High School's disciplinarian of the fifties through the eighties.

Surely that should be "ancestor" not "descendant"?

Anyway, good job. I liked the whole July 4th parts and the draft letter. Doc was very in character (as was everyone else, for that matter, although I never imagined Hubert as you had!). I also liked how Seamus wasn't a wimp yet was still "bullied" a bit by Buford ("Don't ever come in here again!" etc).

AARON:
Originally posted by Blind Spot:
Aaron, where have ya been?

Workin'.

Between part-time school and part-time work I just can't seem to find the energy to really dive into the board. But I'm still here (usually during work hours), doing more reading than writing nowadays. BTW, Spotty, I think you did a very good job of speaking for me in one particular thread (I think it was about doubles and how Doc couldn't build the time machine because he was locked up -- that old topic).

It never occurred to me that Buford accidentally shot his horse simultaneously as it threw him off. I always assumed he got mad that he fell off and simply shot the horse out of anger.

It obviously wouldn't make too much sense to shoot the poor horse (not to mention, more than cruel), but then again, logical thinking and a Tannen don't always go hand in hand!

Actually, in the novel Buford gives that exact impression, that he got mad and shot the horse. But I used my artistic license to put a spin on it. It gives Buford more of a reason to want Doc dead since he was so attached to his horse (even though it's Buford's fault the horse didn't get shod right in the first place!).

Originally posted by Frasier Crane:
Great story! Just one little nipick:

Lawrence Strickland must have been the descendant of the Mr. Strickland of his present, Hill Valley High School's disciplinarian of the fifties through the eighties.

Surely that should be "ancestor" not "descendant"?

Heh, doesn't seem so little to me. That's more of a major nitpick, considering that I said the exact opposite of what I meant! Thanks for pointing it out and thanks for the kind words!

DOCBROWN1985:
Great story Aaron, I wish I would have read it sooner.

AARON:
^ Thanks, DB!

TEKVA:
An excellent story!

BLIND SPOT:
Originally posted by Aaron:
Actually, in the novel Buford gives that exact impression, that he got mad and shot the horse. But I used my artistic license to put a spin on it. It gives Buford more of a reason to want Doc dead since he was so attached to his horse (even though it's Buford's fault the horse didn't get shod right in the first place!).

Either way, it makes sense. In fact, I actually like when writers throw in little curveballs and surprises like that.

I could see him taking it out on Doc (or the blacksmith in his place - assuming this incident happened in the original 1885) regardless. Just the fact that it made him bust his whiskey bottle probably added insult to injury - even if he was too stubborn to realize it was his own fault.

That was like a refreshing ice cold coke on a hot day! I loved it!

(Thanks for archiving the topic from bttf.com, Spotty!)

My favourite quotes;

"The night was as still and silent as before, bar the luminescent dance of pyrotechnics in the sky."

"No sense fagging yerself to debility jus' 'cause you didn't want to break to put some grub down yer gullet."

"Apparently there's a reason the man stays dry"

""No," Doc shook his head vigorously. "You're wrong, Chester. Any place can be called home, but there are few that feel like it. After spending the majority of my life living in a place that was my home by name and name alone, I know that to find a place that is home, and not just a name for the place you reside, is a special thing. And now that I've found it, I can't abandon it. Whether it meets me with a bullet hole or a long, healthy life, it doesn't matter. This is my home, Chester. And whatever my fate, whatever happens, whatever the future brings, I'll be home. And happy."


I love your writing style, which captures the character of Doc perfectly. All too many people think you just need to throw a "Great Scott!" here and a "Sir Isaac H Newton" there and you've captured Doc, which is what had put me off fan fic for quite a long time. However, you seem to write it naturally. It doesn't seem forced. It actually feels like you were there watching it and taking notes!

Did you know you have a very small number of punctuation errors and a spelling error ("wreckless") though? Nothing important at all, and I certainly wouldn't worry about it as it doesn't detract from the excellent writing style at all. Not in any way.

I love your attention to detail in explaining just how things got to be the way they are when we meet Doc again in BTTF 3 - getting the DeLorean moved or writing the letter, for example! Very good! Very good indeed...
It was like reading a new BTTF novel, you captured the classic style perfectly.