+My kh action story
ANSEM STRIKES BACK

chapter 1
destiny islands

One day in a very nice place called Destiny Islands where it was always warm and nothing bad ever happened, a kid named Kaide woke up on the warm beach. He had know idea why he was there.
"Wake up you lazy bum "
"what the? oh hey Kairi. hey whereas Riku? I haven’t seen him for like a day now. he told me he was working on something. I was beging to worry about him."
"yeah me too." said Kairi
"yeah me three" said Sora.
"Oh!! man you scared me Sora," said Kaide.
"Ha! good that’s what I was aiming for .Did I get you "
" yes" giggled Kairi.Riku said he had a surprise that’s why I'm here exclaimed Sora yeah me to said Kairi.Did he tell you to meet you here Kaide.No although I was in bed ooooh so he must of dragged me out you all know me I could sleep through a hurricane.Yeah we know laughed Sora and Kairi.Hey Rikus finally here what did you want us for cried Sora yeah and why did u pull me out of bed. Fine I'll tell you all but first I pulled you out of bed because you would not get out of bed.Ok I'll tell you because you know how we've been talking about going leaving our island. Well I was tired of talking about it so I made a raft for all of us to go and see rare sites. But all we need now is food so Sora and Kairi if you don't mind can you get the food. Sure and what do I do said Kaide.Well you come with me we have to get a sail from Wakkas mom and you know Wakkas mom so why you two get the food we will finish the raft.Ok and how about we meet back here at like 5 said Kairi.Ok I think 2 hours is good said Riku.So about 1 and a half an hour pass and they all met at the beach.Ok well my mom said be home early said Sora me too said Sora so ill see you tomorrow ok said Kaide actually I think I have to go also said Riku ok said Kaide.But before you go I have a question ok shoot said Riku how far do you think the raft will take us? Well I don't know and what if nothings out there. Well that’s one of the reasons I built this raft even if there’s nothing but water I still can say I know what’s out there. Thanks I'll see you tomorrow ok replied riku.Kaide didn't want to go home yet so he went to the secret place by the big tree and the waterfall. He wanted to see that odd looking door again. So nothing changed man I haven't been in here for like 2 years. And all of a sudden a man steps out of the dark corner in the secret place.WHOA!!! what the who are you said Kaide.the figure looked at him he was wearing a brown raincoat type thing he didn't show his face then he spoke.” So very much to learn and you understand so little "what the well you'll see I'm going to find out whats out there interrupted Kaide.The man spoke again a mean less effort one who knows nothing can understand nothing exclaimed the man. And then when Kaide picked up a rock to throw at him he dissapeared.Yeah that’s what I thought man I got to tell Riku ah well I better get some sleep ill tell him tomorrow.

it could be really good, if you put quotes in it. It's hard to understand, when everything is sentences. I know there are speaking parts in there, but, there's no quotes to separate speaches from actions... :( I mean, you started out good, in the beginning, then it's all just one gigantic paragraph...