I found this on a yahoo message board and I thought it was funny. If its not appropriate for in the pits you can move it to Off Topic.
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PRE DATING EXCLUSIVELY AGREEMENT....



1. Before I agree to date you and only you, you must read and agree to all
statements in this contract. By signing this you take full responsibility to
ensure all rules are followed. By not signing this agreement, dating
exclusively is null and void. This contract is NON-NEGOTIABLE!

2. If you stop insulting stock car racing and concede that it is a real
sport, that it takes talent and skill, I will stop calling your WWE
wrestling a bad soap opera with untalented actors. However, I won't stop
thinking it.

3. If you take a genuine interest in racing, I will be more than happy to
help you gain an intimate understanding of the sport.

4. Events and activities are to be planned AROUND NASCAR races. So learn the
race schedule. Under special circumstances, this may not apply, However, If
I will miss a race, it must be taped using TWO VCRs (just in case one fails)
NO special circumstances will be considered for the following races:
Daytona 500, either race at Talladega and the Bristol night race! If I am
not watching them via satellite then I will be at the track watching them.

5. You already know the normal holidays.....Easter, Christmas, Thanksgiving.
I have 2 other holidays: Speed Weeks and Daytona. These holidays WILL be
observed! (All vacation days will be consumed with Nascar events. ) (If you
want a tropical vacation, Nascar stops over in Miami. If you want a
destination in the snow, Bristol has a likely hood.)

6. During a race I DO NOT accept phone calls. No matter how many times you
call.... I will NOT answer.

7. If we are watching a race together...please observe the following rules:
Do not touch the remote, television, receiver, or VCR. Doing so will result
in serious injury or worse. Do not talk during the race...Duct tape will be
used if necessary. You must sit a minimum of five feet away from me. This is
partially for your own safety. If you are in a romantic mood, don't attempt
to share it with me. Take a cold shower until the race is over. (If you
really want to make points with me, make sure there is a cold one in my hand
at all time. Caution shots are greatly appreciated. More than likely the
romantic mood will hit me after I'm a little tipsy... If Tony Stewart wins..
Get ready haha!)

8. While couples usually share things, there are some things that are off
limits. My racing apparel is off limits....DO NOT TOUCH IT! (These things
are sacred and are only deserving of those who appreciate them.)

9. While you may find Jamaica a romantic vacation spot, I find Bristol,
Talladega, Charlotte, and anywhere that has race shops or tracks romantic
spots. (There is nothing better than the smell of exhaust!!! If that doesn't
get a girl hot and bothered, you've got the wrong chick! Likewise, there is
all kinds of romance to be had in a tent!)

10. When I take my vacation, I will be visiting one or more of the places
mentioned above. You don't expect me to go deer hunting, and I don't expect
you to spend the day at Gibbs Racing. ( I actually like to hunt, but only in
the Nascar off season!!!)

11. If we break up and there is stuff to be divided, you can have back
anything you gave me with the exception of any racing related items. You may
keep anything I gave you, with the exception of racing related items. (You
are entitled to any Hendricks/Bush brothers things. If you don't take them,
I will burn them)

12. In the event we move in together, I will require one room to display my
NASCAR stuff....The smallest room will not be acceptable.

13. If it comes down to a choice between you and racing......racing will win
(Don't try it.... No amount of love is greater than that of racing.... You
will fail miserably)

14. If the opportunity arises that I can get tickets to the Bristol race
under the lights, complete with garage access, I will do anything for them.
If it requires your assistance, you will do anything to ensure I get them.

15. If it comes down to a choice between you and Tony Stewart......Tony
Stewart wins! ( And why this has to be a written rule? It should just be
common sense!)

By signing below, you have read and agreed to all terms set forth in this contract. Please know that there may be additions to this contract at any time.

haha i remember seeing that before on another site...but some of it is true..at least for me.

britt

the funny part is that one of my friends have a contract just like that. :nod not a joke.

Hehe! That is rather funny but I love it! Thanks for posting that.

It's from "Chicken Soup for the NASCAR Soul" (great book BTW) funny thing is... my dad has printed off a copy for any potentials to read and sign LMAO... And he even made some other stipulations...

Thanks for posting :)

Ha ha! I'll have to print that off and give it to Josh and make him sign it!

That was so funny!

:hehe That's great!

I love that. I have a bunch of chicken soup books, I so need to find the nascar one.

The Nascar one is really cute. I've read it lots of times.