- With my "busy" schedule of actually having a minimum wage paying job and distractions from other real life things, I don't have the time to really do full shows anymore. So, here you go... a bunch of random matches found on YouTube recapped in one topic. For the most part, it's WWF stuff this go around, but next time I'll probably try and find other stuff that's a bit more obscure. Anyway, here we go...
- Bret “Hitman” Hart vs. Andre The Giant:
From a WWF European Tour, held on April 10th, 1989, according to the video description. The video quality is crap, and there’s practically zero sound… and the graphic reads “BERT” Hart? Andre is rocking the side-burns, too. No Heenan in Andre’s corner, so I guess Heenan missed this tour in favor of another. Lockup to start, and Andre smothers Bret in the corner with his enormous ass. Bret avoids a second attempt and hammers away on his midsection. Bret goes for the leg of Andre, but gets kicked off. Andre with some choking, then shoves Bret back into the corner. Andre knocks Bret down somehow, and drops a lazy elbow on him for the three count at around the 1-minute mark. Talk about a squash match.
- The Undertaker (w/ Paul Bearer) vs. The Mountie (w/ Jimmy Hart):
From an old Coliseum Video titled UK Fan Favorites, but the page says this was on an episode of PrimeTime Wrestling. I doubt it, but I’ve been wrong plenty of times in the past. Commentary is done by Jim Ross and Gorilla Monsoon, which seems REALLY weird, meaning this video was released more than 6-months after Jacques Rougeau was last seen in the WWF. At least he has his awesome theme music. Wait… why is UK Favorites hosting a match held in Cincinnati, OH?! Mountie fakes being scared, because we all know French-Canadians are very tough people. Mountie with a series of rights and boots, all barely sold. Irish whip is reversed, and Undertaker with a press slam. Mountie rolls out of the ring for some stalling. Mountie heads for Bearer, but gets backed off by the urn. Undertaker now runs around the outside at a Zombie pace. Back in the ring, and Mountie runs outside again to go after Bearer. More cat-and-mouse. Undertaker blocks a sling-shot back into the ring, and sends Mountie to the outside instead. Undertaker rams Mountie into the ring apron, and dumps him back into the ring. Irish whip, and Undertaker misses a diving clothesline. He doesn’t sell it, though. Mountie heads outside and nails Undertaker with a steel chair. Undertaker doesn’t sell that very much, either. Back in the ring, and Mountie connects with a piledriver, but Undertaker sits up right after the impact. Mountie with a second piledriver, but with the same result. Mountie with a THIRD piledriver, but this time the Undertaker can’t get up as fast. Mountie gets on the microphone, and now Undertaker sits up. Undertaker with some choking. Irish whip, and the diving clothesline connects this time. Mountie rolls out of the ring and takes a walk, but his exit is cut off by Sgt. Slaughter. They had a minor beef around May-June 1992 that I don’t think was ever resolved on television. Back in the ring, and Undertaker plants Mountie with a Tombstone Piledriver for the three count at 7:29. DUD Nothing much here to defend. Lots of stalling and very little in terms of actual action. It’s your typical Undertaker match from the early 90’s, pretty much.
- Typhoon vs. Papa Shango:
An exclusive match from “Mania”, sometime around February-March I’d say, considering the PBP team of Sean Mooney and Lord Alfred Hayes. Lockup to start, and Shango applies a side headlock. Irish whip to escape and Typhoon wins the collision wars. Shango tries a cross body… kinda, but Typhoon catches him and plants Shango with a forward slam. Test of strength carnival time! Shango boots Typhoon in the gut a few times, then whips him across the ring. Shango misses a charge to the corner, and Typhoon puts him down with another slam. An elbow drop misses, but Shango misses his own attempt. Typhoon with clubbering blows before being thrown into a turnbuckle. Shango hammers away on Typhoon in the corner. Irish whip across the ring, and the charge connects this time. Stomp-stomp-stomping by Shango. Another whip to the buckle, and more stomping. Irish whip, and Shango throws a dropkick?!?! That only gets a two count. Irish whip is reversed, and Shango applies a sleeper hold. Typhoon goes down faster than the time he went diving for the last Twinkie. Irish whip, and Typhoon mounts a comeback. A clothesline sends Shango flying over the top rope, and I smell a B.S. finish. Shango grabs his magic wand and shoots sparkles into Typhoon’s face, and Typhoon picks up the victory by Disqualification at 4:58. After the match, Shango hammers on Typhoon with his wooden staff, and plants him with a back suplex. Whip to the corner, and Typhoon with an avalanche. Irish whip, and Typhoon with a sloppy powerslam. Elbow drop by Typhoon, but Shango rolls away from a splash attempt. ½* Oh, the match sucked, of course.
- Crush vs. Blake Beverly:
I don’t know what show this is from (according to the graphic, it’s WWF Super Card, so I’m guessing it’s a foreign market), but judging by the commentary it’s sandwiched sometime between WrestleMania IX and King of the Ring. I never understood why the WWF kept Crush around under that name, without recognizing the fact he was a member of Demolition no more than a year prior to his re-debut. Lockup to start, and Blake applies a side headlock. Irish whip to escape, and Crush blocks a hip toss. Crush counters with a sloppy belly-to-belly suplex. Lockup #2 goes into the ropes, and Blake with a cheap shot to the midsection. Irish whip is reversed, and a criss-cross leads to a dropkick from Crush. Irish whip, and Crush with a back breaker. Crush with a press slam, and he calls for the end. Blake misses something from the second rope, and Crush applies the Cranium Crunch for the submission victory at 2:17. ¼* Just a squash match for Crush. I’m surprised he never got any kind of serious push. He was pretty over, considering he wore so much damn orange and purple.
- Owen Hart vs. “The Narcissist” Lex Luger:
From an episode of Mania. From sometime after WrestleMania, considering the commentary team of Jim Ross and Gorilla Monsoon. I never knew Mania aired fresh matches like this. I always assumed it was just the rec®ap of the weekend shows and Raw. The referee orders Luger to wear a protective pad on his loaded forearm, so this puts it closer to sometime after King of the Ring. Lockup to start, and Owen applies a headlock. They trade off hammerlocks, with Owen coming out on top of that until Luger grabs the ropes for a break. Smack-talk and shoving, then Owen returns the favor with a bitch slap. Owen with a drop-toe hold and applies another hammerlock. Wristlock applied by Owen, and he takes Luger over with a series of arm drags. ARM BAR! Irish whip to escape, and Owen comes off the ropes with a cross body for a two count. Deep arm drag by Owen, and he goes back to the armbar. Back to the wristlock, and Luger over-sells without really selling. Luger escapes with a back elbow, but gets caught in a sleeper hold. Irish whip to the corner, and Luger runs into a boot. Owen with a bulldog from out of the corner for a two count. Irish whip, and Owen with a back body drop, followed by a spinning heel kick. Owen to the top rope, and a cross body only gets another two count. Mounted punches in the corner by the Rocket, but Luger fights out. Owen blocks an atomic drop and comes back with a dropkick. Luger removes his pad and nails Owen with his loaded arm, and gets the three count at 4:40. *1/4 Not too much of a match, but it wasn’t a complete pile of shit like most Lex Luger matches during his WWF run… or pretty much his entire career after 1990.
- Marty Jannetty vs. Doink The Clown:
From an episode of Monday Night Raw, a few weeks after Jannetty lost the IC Title back to Michaels. Doink hides under the ring during his entrance, and comes out the other side, squirting McMahon and Savage with some stuff. Oh, and this Doink is wearing a jacket all of a sudden. Jannetty gets a boot to the face before the bell, and Doink follows outside to hammer away. Back into the ring, and Doink works Jannetty over in the corner. Irish whip to the corner, and Jannetty comes back with rights of his own. Jannetty with a back elbow, followed by a modified bulldog for a two count. Arm drag takeover and into an armbar by Jannetty. Doink escapes with a forearm to the side of the head. Irish whip is reversed, and Doink sends Jannetty rolling with a shoulder block. Jannetty eats turnbuckle from the apron. Jannetty blocks a second attempt and returns the favor to Doink. Irish whip, and Doink misses a kick to the face. Jannetty covers for two, and applies another armbar as we take a commercial break. We come back, and Jannetty connects with a dropkick before going back to the arm. AAAAH! Some goofy fan is wearing a horribly freakish Hulk Hogan Halloween mask. Back to the action, and Doink dumps Jannetty out of the ring. Jannetty to the top rope, and he comes off with a cross body for a two count. Criss-cross and Doink catches Jannetty with a powerslam. Doink with an elbow drop, followed by what looks like the cross-face chicken-wing! Doink releases it quickly, though, and stomps away. Doink with a back suplex, followed by some bitch slapping and a half-nelson. Scoop slam by Doink, and he heads to the top rope… the Whoopie Cushion connects, but he doesn’t go for a cover until Jannetty has enough time to recover. Doink with a modified hang-man’s neck breaker for another two count. Doink continues to bring the pain. Doink to the top rope again, but this time Jannetty slams him off. Jannetty with a series of blows to the midsection, followed by a diving back elbow. Irish whip, and Jannetty connects with a dropkick, followed by a suplex for a two count. Irish whip again, and Jannetty with a clothesline for another two count. Irish whip reversed, and Jannetty slams Doink face-first into the canvas for another two count. Doink with a shot to the eyes, but Jannetty’s momentum takes both men over the top rope, to the floor. They exchange blows until the bell sounds. Jannetty with a reverse crescent kick and hurracanrana, followed by a cross body off the apron. Back in the ring, and the action is still going on. The official result is a Double Count-Out at 8:44. ** To quote someone else with a far stronger fanbase than my own, this was perfectly acceptable wrestling. Nothing earth shattering, but nothing to be ashamed of, either. Jannetty and Doink were two sleeper contenders for valuable performers for 1993… until Doink turned face and Jannetty kept getting taken off T.V. for various discipline problems.
- Owen Hart vs. Shawn Michaels (w/ Diesel):
From July 1993. The banners say Monday Night Raw, but I don’t remember this ever happening, so maybe it was taped from a Raw night and broadcasted on Mania or All-American Wrestling as an “exclusive” match. Owen is still “The Rocket”, wearing neon-blue tights, and Diesel isn’t a leather wearing bad-ass yet. Lockup to start, and Owen applies a wristlock. Shawn counters, and Owen counters back with a series of flips. Shawn escapes by hooking the ropes. Shawn with finger-poking, so Owen slaps him and takes Shawn over into a armbar. Owen works the arm and applies a wristlock. Shawn escapes with a back elbow, but runs into another hip toss, and Owen goes back to the armbar. Owen works the arm s’more, and applies a wristlock. Shawn escapes and applies a hammerlock. Owen uses the momentum of both men to send Shawn flying out of the ring. Shawn sucker punches Owen thanks to a Diesel distraction, and tosses Owen back into the ring. Shawn to the top rope, and he comes off with an axe-handle. Shawn with a series of rights, followed by a back breaker for a two count. Snapmare by Michaels, and he applies a reverse chinlock. Shawn sure is busting his ass for this match. Owen fights back in a hammerlock struggle, but Shawn pulls the hair and keeps the chinlock applied. Owen escapes with elbows to the midsection, and takes Shawn down with a back slide for a two count. Shawn is up first and hammers away on Owen again. Snapmare by Michaels, and back to the chinlock. Irish whip to the corner, and Shawn runs into a boot from Owen. Bulldog headlock by Owen for a two count. Irish whip, and Owen with an over-head belly-to-belly suplex for another two count. Irish whip, and Owen with a spinning heel kick. Owen bounces off the ropes, but Diesel trips him up for the Disqualification at 7:12… you mean OWEN HART won a match in 1993 against a name superstar, even if it’s by DQ? After the match, Shawn attacks Owen from behind and Diesel pounds on him with his big right fist. Oh well, at least he won the match, right? **1/4 Match wasn’t anything to write home about. It was technically “fine”, but Shawn really wasn’t giving an excellent performance (surprise, surprise), and Owen just did his signature stuff outside of getting his ass kicked.
- Flash Funk vs. Brian Pillman:
From the August 11th, 1997 episode of Raw. Before the match, we are, for some reason, thrown to a “hype job” for Raw Magazine, featuring an article about Dustin Rhodes and his problems with his big ol’ daddy. Oh, and Brian Pillman has to wrestle in a dress, because of the stipulations from his match with Goldust at SummerSlam. Clips of last week are shown from the Pillman/Bob Holly match, and Pillman lost by Count-Out thanks to a distraction by Goldust and Marlena at ringside. Pillman hammers away to start and works over Funk in the corner. Pillman takes Funk down and rubs his face in the canvas, then punches some more. Irish whip, and Pillman with a charging elbow. Sgt. Slaughter comes up on the screen to announce the Patriot and a partner of his choice against the British Bulldog and Owen Hart. Oh, the match keeps going on, nothing much happening. Irish whip, and Funk comes off the ropes with a twirling forearm. Irish whip to the corner, and Funk with a high knee. Funk to the top with a twisting body press for a two count. Scoop slam, and Funk calls for whatever… Funk to the top, and the moonsault meets the knees of Pillman. DDT by Pillman, and the theme music of Goldust goes off. Goldust is nibbling on some popcorn and Marlena is just standing around. We see the backstage footage of Pillman putting his dress on. With all the chaos, Funk shocks Pillman with a small package for the three count at 3:18. So that means Pillman keeps wearing a dress until he wins a match on Raw. ¼* Match wasn’t too good. Really hard to watch Pillman from this point of his career, considering what a worker he was less than half-a-decade earlier.
- Ahmed Johnson vs. Kane:
From November 1997, possibly the week before Survivor Series ’97. Originally, this is supposed to be Ahmed vs. STONE COLD!, but it ain’t gonna happen. Commercial for WWF Action Figures, including the Head Bangers beating up on the Legion of Doom. Ahmed hammers away on Kane with rights. Irish whip is reversed, and Kane catches Ahmed in the goozle and chokeslams him to hell. Kane sets off his pyro, then scoops up Ahmed and plants him with the Tombstone Piledriver. No match, I guess. Paul Bearer instructs Kane to finish Ahmed off… and a second piledriver connects. Out comes Mankind, and he puts the Mandible Claw on Paul Bearer. Mankind with a lead pipe, and he bends it over the head of Kane, knocking him out. (Note: the pipe is obviously a fake, bending before the impact was complete). Kane sits up though, and Mankind grabs a chair in self-defense. No match, no rating, but Kane’s beatdowns in 1997 were pretty awesome.
- Blackjack Bradshaw vs. The Artist Formerly Known As Goldust:
Before the match, “Dusty Rhodes” cuts an unflattering promo about his career, notably mentioning Ric Flair and Terry Funk. I don’t know, it might be Bruce Prichard, considering he sounds almost like Brother Love with a southern ‘twang. Suddenly, Dusty Rhodes’ music plays… and out comes The Artist Formerly Known as Goldust dressed as his father, including Polka Dots and the funky-colored eyes. Goldust does some Dusty motions and threatens Bradshaw with the bionic elbow. Lockup, and Dusty-Dust takes Bradshaw down with a arm drag. Bradshaw no-sells an elbow, and knocks Dusty-Dust out of the ring. More Dusty Rhodes imitations. Back in the ring, and Bradshaw hammers away on Dusty-Dust. Boots to the face! Irish whip to the corner, and Bradshaw follows in with a clothesline. Irish whip, and Bradshaw with a back body drop. Bradshaw with an elbow drop for a two count. Bradshaw kicks away at Dusty-Dust some more and drops another elbow for two. Irish whip, and Bradshaw floors Dusty-Dust again. Irish whip, and Dusty-Dust ducks a clothesline and does the signature Dusty stuff. Bradshaw no-sells and cleans Goldust’s clock with the Lariat for the three count at 3:38. ¾* Another bad “comedy” match, with very little in terms of actual wrestling, and comedy that I’m sure only a few people found funny. Michael Cole tries to get a word with Goldust after the match, but he just rambles nonsense.
- The Brood (w/ Christian) vs. Public Enemy:
(Gangrel & Edge vs. Rocco Rock & Johnny Grunge)
From February 1999, considering the information mentioned during the commentary. I think the Brood weren’t members of the Ministry yet… I don’t think. Public Enemy are making their first appearance in the WWF. The Brood jump the P.E. on their way in the ring and hammert away. Edge knocks Grunge out of the ring with a dropkick, where Christian hammers away. Double teaming on Rock in the ring, and we get Poetry in Motion. Irish whip, and Grunge comes back in with a double bulldog to the Brood. Flapjack to Edge, and a double hip toss into a slam on Gangrel. Rock heads to the top and nails his assisted senton. Christian runs in for the DQ at 1:26, and the Brood hammer away on the Brood. The lights go out, and the Public Enemy gets a blood bath for their troubles. DUD Nothing to see here, other than the WWF’s burial of the Public Enemy starting on day one in the company.
- Hulk Hogan vs. Paul “The Great” Wight:
Joined in Progress, from Memphis Wrestling, held on April 27th, 2007. Yes, that’s the actual name given for the Giant… er… Big Show… er… Paul Wight on the graphic. Wight hammers away on Hogan, with clubbering blows, before applying a bearhug. Crowd with a “Hogan” chant, because that’s going to help him break the Kung-Fu grip of the Giant Show. Hogan appears to be humping Show’s chest in an attempt to break the hold. Talk about being lazy. If both men are so incapable of putting on a match without a 3-minute bearhug spot, they shouldn’t be wrestling. Hogan finally fights out with a series of roundhouse rights. Hogan off the ropes, and Wight drops him with a giant clothesline. Show with an elbow drop, but that only gets two. He calls for the chokeslam, and we all know how bad Hulk is at taking them (see: Judgment Day 2002). GOOZLE! CHOKESLAM! Show covers, but it’s Hulk Up Time! Jimmy Hart is creaming his pants on commentary. YOU! Roundhouse rights by the Hulkster, followed by the big boot, sending Wight over the top and to the floor. They brawl outside the ring with little enthusiasm. Hogan no-sells being rammed into a ring post and brings a chair into the ring. Hogan with a shot across the back, then rams Wight into the exposed buckle. Hogan calls for a slam. Rake of the eyes, and Hogan slams the Giant! Hogan plays to the crowd before dropping the big leg, and that’s enough for the three count at 6:21. Hulkamania is running wild… still! He’s American Made, you know. ¼* From what was here, the match sucked donkey-dick, but I have too much of a heart to give it negative points for being a stinky pile of wretched shit thanks to a 3+ minute bearhug.
Final Thoughts: Nothing really worth hunting for here. There's a minor novelty in the Hogan/Wight match, but everything else is practically low card filler stuff during an era that most fans aren't really fond of when looking back on. In short, not a batch of matches worth sitting through, unless you have a lot of time to kill and have absolutely no life (cheap shot at myself).