In case you all didn't figure it out, PTL is once again alive. The territory will be taken over by new poster wordtoyourmother, who is a guy from TheCageEffect. He is hella talented in EWR and has some sweet ideas.

I like the idea of keeping PTL alive rather than killing it -- so welcome him.

YAY for me!

So Rowe still gets Angle?

EDIT: Scratch that, I just finished reading that segment

Haha, I wish I was getting Angle :P Can't wait to see the new PTL.

Disclaimer...the new PTL will really be Pushing the Limits (PUN INTENDED MOTHER FUCKERS). We promise to have trolls, vampires, zombies, vikings, pirates, ninjas, and Chris Bosh so he can cock slap people.

Sounds like a good time. It's just a shame that Undertaker and Gangrel are taken.

I'm looking to make lots of trades so if you're willing to sacrifice your more "crazygenic" wrestlers for guys on this roster, let me know.

I'm not sure what you mean by "Crazygenic" but if anyone from NEW interests you, just let me know and maybe we could do business.

No midgets?

Midgets can't beat people up and have lame stats. I have have a leperchaun who steals shit. But that's the closest you'll get to a midget.

Re-work his gimmick and make him a NINJA MIDGET. Can you imagine how hard it would be to find a Ninja Midget? Hard enough to spot a ninja.. but imagine if he was also a midget?!

Ninja Midgets are called Minjas. (source=askaninja.com)

The new PTL guy has bailed. PTL is apparantly doomed. However, one last try:

tjwills will be taking over PTL immediately in hopes of salvaging it.

NWA: Pushing The Limits Presents...

Saturday Night Killing Spree

The pyro starts flying as we hear the voices of Jim Bob McGraw and Doink the Clown welcoming us back to another edition of Saturday Night Killing Spree.

Doink: First, we want to apologize for our not being on the air last week, but somethings are beyond our control. Trust me when I say that the matter has been taken care of.

Jim Bob: Well, with that bit of housekeeping out of the way, let's get to our first match.


Match One: Tag
The Spot Monkeys vs. The Stampede Bulldogs

Matt Sydal and Jack Evans come out wearing the monkey suits that they debuted two weeks ago on Saturday Night Killing Spree. They trudge to the ring, looking rather ashamed. They get in the ring and begin to really showcase their highflying offense when TJ Wilson turns the tide by grabbing Evans tail on his monkey suit as he jumps off the top attempting some high risk move. Evans hits hard on his head and Wilson covers him for the three as his partner keeps Sydal busy on the outside of the ring.

Winner: The Stampede Bulldogs

Doink: An impressive showing by the young...

Doink is cut off by the beginning, unmistakable strains of music associated with "The Heartbreak Kid" Shawn Michaels. HBK comes marching out towards the ring with a look of determination on his face and a microphone in hand.

HBK: Cut my damn music. (motioning towards Evans) Is this what you people want to see? Talented young workers forced to wear monkey suits and prance around here for your amusement? What the hell kind of entertainment is this? I've been in this business a long time and I've never worked with such a fly by night operation as this. Hell, they can't even keep their show on the air for two weeks in a row. The "situation" that Dink referred to earlier that kept PTL off the air last week? Backlund's crazy ass forgot to book the arena for the show. I showed up ready to wrestle and what did I find? A friggin dog show, that's what.

Sydal and Evans have regained their feet and are looking at HBK with rapt attention. He turns and notices them, shaking his head.

HBK: Take that crap off. Now, get those dumbass suits off.

Sydal and Evans take off their monkey suits, revealing their more familiar ring gear underneath.

HBK: That's more like it. Don't you boys feel better in this?

They both nod.

HBK: I've seen you boys work. You don't need stupid costumes and gimmicks to get over with these fans. Hell, Jack, I've seen you do things in the ring that I didn't know the human body was capable of. And Matt, that moonsault belly to belly thing you do? It makes me hurt just watching a guy get rammed down with that. But, boys, you're never going to be able to reach your full potential in a company that's ran half-assed by some lunatic who still thinks he's running for president. Hell no. We need to end this, and we need to end it now.

Sydal and Evans both nod in agreement, obviously drinking the Kool-Aid being offered to them by HBK.

HBK: (turning his attention back to the crowd) And that's why I propose this. Backlund, you get your 5 best wrestlers that you can find, because I've already got myself two more in the back, and if I'm not mistaken, these boys are ready to join up, right, guys?

Sydal and Evans: (in unison) Yes, Sir!

HBK smiles.

HBK: So, Backlund. You get your 5. I'll have my 5. And next week, right here on Saturday Night, we have a survivor style 10 man tag. Winner takes all. All, in this case, meaning that if we win, we get our freedom and you shut this place down. If your team wins, we stay here and don't complain about it. We'll dress up like monkeys, clowns, porn stars, lunatics, you name it. You got the balls?

HBK drops the mic in the middle of the ring and walks out with Sydal and Evans close behind. The crowd is silent, not knowing what to make of what they just witnessed.

Doink: What a bombshell challenge by HBK here tonight! I'm being told that we'll have a response from Mr. Backlund before we go off the air.

Second Match: Tag
The Hardy Boyz vs. The Bloodbath(Vampiro and Gangrel)
The Hardy Boyz dominate this match from the opening bell. Matt Hardy hits the Twist of Fate on Gangrel as Jeff hits the Swanton Bomb on Vampiro and both cover for the double pin within 3 minutes of the match starting.

Winner: The Hardy Boyz

Matt Hardy grabs a microphone before the announcers can even begin talking about the victory.

Matt Hardy: Shawn! You want to come out here and run down this company? A company that has finally let Jeff and I be ourselves? A company that has let us team up again, after all this time? Well, we'll be damned if you're going to take this company away from us! Mr. Backlund, we've got your back!

Matt and Jeff embrace in the ring as they celebrate their PTL solidarity.

Doink: Well, hot damn, somebody is going to stand up to that bully Shawn Michaels and who better than a team that often gets compared to his old team of The Rockers?

As Matt and Jeff turn to leave, Joey Mercury and Johnny Nitro(MNM) slide into the ring from the crowd. They jump the Hardyz from behind and start just laying the boots to them. They're really taking it to the PTL loyal team.

Jim Bob: Oh, Christ, Doink. I guess we know who the other two that HBK was talking about are. It looks like MNM is firmly in the Anti-PTL camp. Jesus, they're going to kill these boys!

From the entryway, Chris Hero comes on a dead sprint for the ring, but MNM see him coming and easily retreat into the crowd. Hero stands over the fallen bodies of the Hardyz and reaches for a mic.

Chris Hero: You sons of bitches have done it now! You wanted to have the best in PTL take you on? Well, you've got it, because now you've got the best tag team in PTL, The Hardyz, and me, a bonafide superhero, Chris Hero!

Hero drops the mic and tries to get MNM to come back and face him. They slowly walk out through the crowd.

Doink: I can't believe this, Jim Bob! This company is tearing itself apart!

Match Four: Singles
Kurt Angle vs. "American Dragon" Bryan Danielson

This match has classic written all over it from the opening bell. Angle gets the upper hand with some shoot wrestling to only have the momentum taken back from him by Danielson pulling off an amazing reversal of a basic takedown into the Cattle Mutilation. Angle reaches the ropes, but he was very close to having to submit there. The two men stare at each other in the middle of the ring with slight smiles playing at their faces. The respect these men have for each other is obvious to anybody watching. The lock up again and are jockeying for position when HBK's Anti-PTL faction comes storming the ring from all sides. Jack Evans flips into the ring only to be met by a quick lariat by Angle, but soon the numbers overwhelm the duo and it seems that HBK's crew has the upperhand.
Winner: Draw

The Anti-PTL crew continues pounding away on Angle and Danielson. However, here comes the cavalry. Hero and the Hardyz come running down the ramp, followed closely by PTL owner Bob Backlund. Seeing the odds evening up, HBK and his crew quickly exit the ring and hightail it into the crowd, getting minimum safe distance from the extremely hyped up threesome that have just charged the ring. Backlund reaches out and grabs himself a microphone.

Backlund: You think I'm crazy, HBK?!? You think I'm crazy, huh?!? Well, fine, I'll show you crazy! You have your match, with your stipulations! Next week, in this ring I'm standing in, it will be HBK, MNM, Jack Evans, and Matt Sydal vs. Kurt Angle, Bryan Danielson, Chris Hero, and The Hardy Boyz. And don't think I won't take you up on your offer to do ANY gimmick I want when you lose!

Kurt Angle pulls himself up by the ropes, obviously the worse for wear after the beating he just took. He reaches out and takes the microphone from Bob Backlund.

Angle: You sorry son of a bitch, Shawn! We had the chance to build this company, from the ground up. But no! You couldn't swallow your pride for a few months while we outlived the dumbass gimmicks, the monkey suits, the Jotnar. You couldn't wait to get your precious "Show Stopping" ass to someplace more "suited" for your unique gifts. Well, I've got news for you, asshole. You're going to be playing some of the worst gimmicks in your life after I break your goddamn ankle next week. You've just pissed off the Olympic hero. You've just crossed the wrong mother(beep)!

Angle throws the microphone to the outside of the ring and stands surrounded by his team for next week, shouting out at the retreating Anti-PTL faction who do have worried looks on their faces.

Doink: That's all our time for this week, folks, but I can guaran-damn-tee you that you don't want to miss next week's show!